Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Magic Missile

You know what I've never understood?

Origami. I mean, it's paper. Folded up to make shit. It seems kinda...pointless.

Yeah.

And you know what I hate? When they make sequels to movies and games that should not get sequels, and then leave things that DESERVE sequels completely...sequel-less.

Like, look at all the Disney movies that crappy crappy craptacular crapful sequels. Like...The original movies were such classics, that the MERE FACT that they've been continued just detracts from the originals.

And video games...There are some games out there that are WOEFULLY lacking of sequels.

Where's my Chrono Cross sequel?!

Chrono Trigger? Orgasmic.

Chrono Cross? Friggin' loved it.

And then they stoooooooooooooopped. Give me another one, you fuckers! Or I will hunt you down and cut you open slowly with a rusty knife. I'll carve my name into your chest, and write a list of reasons to make a sequel on your BACK.

Yeah. Bitch.

And Illusion of Gaia. THAT GAME WAS AWESOME.

I could keep going, but you'd get bored.

Yeah.

So I'm hoping to reprise my role as Landrec the Wise soon in that game I was talking about in last night's post. That's an awesome name. I can't wait to kick some ass with my ALL-POWERFUL MAGIC.

I hate communism.

That's...All I have to say.

Until next time,
MONSTERS IN THE SEWERS!?
~Kataron

Oregano is a funny word.

So the past couple days have been interesting.

Yesterday I had a telephone conversation with my landlord in which he actually hung up on me. It started out about how my room should be cleaned out so he can show it to people (something I don't actually have to agree to, by the way.), and then I made a comment about how "it should be clean", and he said "It isn't". I asked him how he knew that, and stated that if he had been in my room, that was considered trespassing. And I know for a fact that he has trespassed and entered my room on multiple occasions to open my window and do who the fuck knows what else. Then he said that he'd been helping Jared clean the top floor. By help, he meant that he'd vacuumed for us. He said that my door had been open, and that was how he knew my room wasn't clean.

He made a sarcastic comment about whether or not he'd be seeing me over the summer. And as you all know, I'm still in Rockwood due to a lack of working computer (as the fan on my computer down there doesn't function properly in the least), and I told him that my computer was the main reason I was down here. At one point he accused me of having an "aggressive tone". Which I did. I mean, if somebody you were supposed to trust with your things while you're not there decides to enter your own personal space, go into your BEDROOM, where you SLEEP, and makes a statement that pretty much admits his own guilt, I have a right to have an "aggressive tone". When I said that my computer down there wasn't working properly, he said "Oh, so it can be moved into the spare bedroom?". I said no. It still -works-, per se, just not for extended periods of time. Then he got irritated, and asked if it could be moved off to the side, moved out of the way, and I said that I liked it where it was and that it wasn't moving anywhere.

Then he said "Okay, have a good day, Nate" and hung up on me.

What a fucking asshole.

Then.

THEN.

He leaves a note for Jared that says that Jared can be the one to deal with me from now on, because apparently I can't be civil to him on the phone. -I- can't be civil on the phone. Because I had an aggressive tone and don't want him in my bedroom, or to have my shit moved around. And he hangs up on me. HANGS UP ON ME. And I'm the fucking one that can't be fucking civil.

God dammit, after all the fucking illegal shit he's done with us, I would fucking LOVE to drag his stupid goddamn ass down to court and make him fucking pay for it. The illegal security deposit, the illegal trespassing, which we have proof of because Jared CAUGHT HIM, and he'd still been doing it. The illegal charging of rent when it's not due yet. All illegal. And I don't think the fucker even fucking REALIZES it. Or maybe he does, and he's just a goddamn enormous fucking asshole.

This is the first place I've moved to, and he's made it absolutely fucking miserable. He spends forever telling you something that should take five fucking minutes. He plays his television ridiculously loud ridiculously late, because he's going deaf or something. And that fucking SUCKS if you happen to sleep directly above where his tv is. And meanwhile we can't even flush the goddamn toilet while he's asleep because it's so loud and we're trying to be fucking courteous, and he doesn't even extend the same goddamn benefit to us.

When I'm living somewhere, I shouldn't have to tip-toe around upstairs for fear of the landlord hearing me and initiating some pointless goddamn conversation. I shouldn't have had to sit around in the cold all day because he turned the furnace off and made us open all the windows in the goddamn middle of fucking winter (also illegal, by the way, he's required by law to supply us with heat until a certain time of the year), just because his carbon monoxide or whatever detector had a reading of .02 when he got up and had since faded and wasn't reading a goddamn thing.

I'm still pissed about that, and how he woke me up, forced me to get out of bed, and then asked "Can I wake Jared up?". Fucking asshole. You'd damn well fucking better wake him up if you're going to force me to get out of bed and wake ME the fuck up, just so you can tell me how you're going to make my fucking day miserable by being a douchebag.

AND it took him until fucking winter to tell us that the goddamn smoke detector didn't work. Over three months we were there, and we thought the thing worked! Turned out it's only for show, if you turn it on, it beeps non-stop until you disconnect the battery. They're not fucking expensive! And you know what else? That's fucking illegal too! He's legally responsible to have a smoke detector on every floor of the house, and there's probably something in the landlord/tenant code about that, too.

And you know what he said when the stupid carbon monoxide or whatever detector went off?

And I fucking quote:

"At first, I thought it was the smoke detector, so I went back to bed."

WHAT THE FUCK?!

You know what would have happened if it WAS the smoke detector, and if there WAS a fire?! We would have fucking died, because he would have gotten the fuck out of there and we wouldn't have had a goddamn smoke detector to tell us that we were in fucking danger, because he's too fucking cheap to buy a new one. FUCK.

And then he thought that if we didn't give him the rent a week early, he would give us a week to get our shit out of there and move out, and not refund our illegal security deposit, or our last month's rent, or the extra half-month's rent he illegally charged us. He doesn't even know a goddamn thing about the process of eviction. And you know what, if we didn't know about it either, he actually could have done it, and we would have had no idea whatsoever how insanely illegal it was.

And that's how we found out that all the other shit he'd been doing was completely illegal. And we're not even MAKING AN ISSUE of it. Because we just want to finish our tour of duty there and get the FUCK out. If we piss him off, he'd just continue to make life miserable for us, and fuck that.

Oh, and also, the other day, he called at ten forty-five at night, on a Sunday night. I think I mentioned that. But what the fuck? People are SLEEPING. Not me, not that I'd pick up a phone call from him that late. And when I talked to him on the phone, he said that he "didn't even think about that until afterwards". Well, you'd better fucking think about it if you're going to call at a retarded hour and wake people up. I mean, if he'd woken up my dad, and he answered the phone, he would have been fucking FURIOUS.

God dammit.

I hate that man.

I hope to God he doesn't try to fuck over the next people that move in there the same way he fucked over us. I mean, if I'd known that he would enter my bedroom while I was gone, I would have never even considered moving in there. I'm still fucking FURIOUS about that. Fuck the window and fuck your stupid goddamn "stale air". Stay the fuck out of my room, you stupid bastard.

He's lucky Jared's so much more calm about this than I am...I'd be raising all kinds of hell. And if I was down there, he'd sure as hell not be showing my room to anybody, that's for damn sure. The only reason I don't mind is because I'm not sleeping in it right now.

And it shouldn't even matter to him whether I'm there or not, because he's still getting his fucking rent money. Asshole.

*deep breath*

Sorry, after he hung up on me, I've just been pissed about this, needed to vent a bit. If he tries to call me back at some point, I'm either just not going to pick up, or I'm going to hang up on him. Nobody disrespects Nate like that and gets away with it!

Well...A lot of people do, actually. But it still pisses me off.

Anyways, today was good. Nobody hung up on me. I got some dental work done. That's another reason I'm down here. I've had five dental appointments in the last little while. One when my tooth was killing me, one to figure out what needed to be done, and three spent working on various teeth. And I'm pleased to say that once two more cavities are dealt with, my mouth will be in tip-top condition, better than it has been in years. Which is good, because it was bugging me when I was in Kitchener too, but I couldn't really do anything about it. More than one night it kept me from getting any sleep.

Oh, and I had my appointment with the dental surgeon yesterday too. The one that's going to remove my wisdom teeth. That, unfortunately, can't happen until the end of the month, and I'm going to be in a ridiculous amount of pain for a while after they all come out. I'll be swollen and hurting and I'll probably be very unpleasant.

It's costing fifteen hundred dollars. ONE AND A HALF THOUSAND DOLLARS. And apparently? It's going to be done in like an hour. They're making one thousand, five hundred dollars, for an hour's worth of work. Holy fuck. That's like three months of my rent. For an HOUR.

And the sad thing? I expected it to be in the neighbourhood of two thousand dollars. It's CHEAPER than I thought it would be. Fuuuuuck. They make crazy money :|

Okay, here's a fun little exercise. Think about all your friends. Visualize them if you have to. Shit, check your Facebook friends, even people you're only kind of friends with. This is something that was brought up to me by Graham Schmultz(sp?) in grade twelve philosophy.

Out of all the people you know, is there anybody that you could look at and say "Hey, yeah, I think they're going to become a dentist". I sure as hell can't. I can't think of a SINGLE PERSON I know that I deem likely to go into the dental health profession. And yet, odds are, at least somebody I know is going to do that. It's just not something you think of.

So go ahead, think about it.

PONDER IT.

Yeah.

So I tried out a new game tonight, with Eric and Andrew. We didn't get to finish, because it was taking a crazy-long amount of time.

It was your basic dungeon-delving sort of game. Heroes, monsters, map tiles built piece by piece to make for easy mixing and matching, cards.

Andrew played as the Overlord, or the big bad guy of the dungeon. Essentially the Dungeon Master, controlling all the baddies and making them kill us, as well as playing his own cards to try to stop us from kicking all the ass. In fact, one of the cards he played, a certain pit trap, killed Eric.

Eric was playing as...Sir Alric, sir Denrick, sir something. I don't know. He was your basic fighter. There are twenty Heroes in all to choose from, but you can customize them further.

There are three different character traits you can use to customize your character.

There's a number of melee traits, a number of subterfuge traits, and a number of magic traits. I only really looked through the magic ones, but they had things like...

Familiars, different types.

Increases to stats, damage done, other such things.

Aura and Command abilities, Aura causing damage to anybody stepping close to you, and Command making your allies a bit stronger.

"Divine Retribution". I remember this card, because nobody wanted it. Basically, if you die, everybody within three squares gets taken out too. But really, we didn't want to plan ahead for such unpleasant eventualities. I didn't die anyway.

Each character gets three traits, from the various pools. The pools you pick from are dependent on your character's traits.

For example, some characters get three melee traits, some get three magic traits, some get three subterfuge traits, while all other characters mix and match. Eric, for example, had one of each. I had two magics and one subterfuge.

Each Hero also has a special ability. I forget what Eric's was, but mine gave me two additional "charge" points whenever I used a magic attack. Which I could use to power my magic staff and give me either an additional range or an additional point of damage. And I could roll more charge with my attack role, so quite often I would be able to get a few additional points.

Plus I picked a card that gave me two additional points with every attack. So I got four every time I cast a spell, so I had an automatic +2 to range or damage. Needless to say, it KICKED ASS.

I also got another magic trait gave me bonus defense to magic spells, but I never had any cast on me, so it was kinda useless...My other one though, a subterfuge trait, gave me +3 range. Which meant that I could generally just sink my extra charge into more damage. OR attack from a REALLY GODDAMN LONG distance. Plus when I rolled, I generally got good range with the roll anyway, so even when attacking from far away, I could usually hit pretty hard.

Eric got a trait that made him stronger, and another one that let him shoot around corners, and then one that I don't remember.

But anyways, we were kicking ass and taking names for a while. Eric would rush in, I'd stand at the back and shoot fireballs or whatever, and I killed a LOT of monsters. Like, overkill. Like, ten damage to something with three health. Basically the equivalent of killing them and then continuing to beat the corpse, just because it pissed you off. Which was awesome.

We didn't finish though, as we only cleared half the dungeon, and it was already ten o'clock. I wanted to get back here and talk to Amy (since we didn't talk all day, with her doing school stuff and then working), which was probably good, because she couldn't stay very long, as she has more school stuff to finish tomorrow, and her battery was dying. Since her cat chewed through her power cable, she hasn't been able to spend as much time on-line. I miss her a lot :(

Also Andrew has to work tomorrow at seven, so he wanted to get back at a decent hour, so it worked for everyone that we called it a night. Except Eric, I guess, but he didn't seem to mind.

He's had it kinda rough lately, his lady-friend (or former lady-friend now), just broke things off with him. I think they were together for about eight months. It's sadness, but he's taking it surprisingly well. He's not all mopey and depressed, although he probably is when nobody's around. I know I've been there, it is not fun. Unless you're emo, then you probably get off on that shit. Goddamn emo kids.

But yeah, he's been taking it pretty well, and he's got his friends there to support him through all of it, and I know that when I was going through that stuff, it was my friends that helped me get through it all. Well, that and Coca-Cola. Mostly the friends though. Probably a combination of the two.

Anyways, this is a long post, so I'm going to wrap it up and finish the season one finale of X-Files I'm watching off Surfthechannel. I figure with the movie coming out, I should refamiliarize myself with the show, especially since I only saw a few assorted episodes. I love it though, I absolutely love it. So I'll probably finish that, and call it a night.

So yeah.

Until next time,
I have no idea how the fuck I vented my frustrations before I started blogging. My GOD, I must have been bottling up all that irritation for YEARS. Shit, that's probably why I get so irritable. Pent-up RAGE. Sometimes it just feels good to explode about it where nobody that matters can read it. Good times.
~Kataron

Monday, June 23, 2008

Redundant

WELL.

It's been an interesting weekend, I guess.

Friday night had youth group, we watched Batman Begins in the church while playing Zombies!!!.

Needless to say, I was cheating throughout the entire game. It's what I do. I cheat, cheat, cheat. And oh, how I enjoy cheating at games. Any game I can get away with it, I will cheat. It's pretty bad. Three Dragon Ante, I was particularly bad with. I couldn't play a single game without cheating I would always be hiding away Tiamat or Bahamut, just waiting for my chance to be like "BAM, BITCH, GIMME YO GOLD".

I love that game.

But anyways, then we went for Chinese, which was good, but then my dad was an ass when I got home, and we had another one of his famous drunken talks. Frustrating.

Then on Saturday...I spent large portions of the day on-line, then went out to Faery Fest. Except not REALLY Faery Fest, just the fashion show part of it because Rebecca was in it. And Caitlin, I guess. Didn't really see that much of them though. And there was a guy in a Victorian suit with a cane. I wanted him to start fighting people, but he wouldn't. And there was a guy that was dressed like a woman. Creepy.

Oh! Oh! Oh!

AND.

There was...Raoul. RAOUL. I have no idea what his real name was, but he was some friend of Emily's (Dave's sister, for those of you not in the know). We believe he may have been gay. He certainly acted the part. Anyways, it doesn't matter what his real name was, it became Raoul at some point between them picking me up and when we got to Faery Fest. RAOUL! Say it with me! RAOUL!

That looks like it's spelled wrong, but Firefox isn't saying it's incorrect. It's saying Faery is, but not...Raoul.

The fashion show was good, and the dancing beforehand was strange. I thought that it might have been like, a normal dance. Like, the kind where everybody dances and I sit around looking awkward because I don't want to dance with anybody. That's why I never went to any dances in high school, only the prom/formal/whatever. Yeah, the one where I danced with one person, and she had a bet going to see who could dance with the most people. Yep.

But it was the band playing while people got up on stage and learned how to do dances from a woman that apparently knew what she was doing. At one point they were one person short, and one woman tried to pull me up to join them, but I refused. It was a strange nine-person dance.

There was a really really really freakin' weird Asian guy.

During the first dance thing, he was yelling.

"YEAH!"

"SKIP WITH ME!"

"YEAH!"

"THIS IS PHYSICALLY STIMULATING!"

That's what he said. "This is physically stimulating". Dave and I exchanged looks over that one.

It was awkward.

And then? On the ride home?

Dave's father informed me that my life was worthless. It was kind of awkward as well.

Then I got home, was on-line for a while, felt really sick, and went to bed.

Then today I got up, went on-line for a while, had a bath, played Fable, then came back on-line and have been on-line since. Today was especially dull.

Oh, and apparently my landlord called me. I had my headphones on, so I didn't hear.

He called me at 10:45. On a Sunday night.

Who the FUCK calls somebody at 10:45 on a Sunday night?! Normal people are ASLEEP at that time! He tried calling my cell, which still isn't working, so he thought he'd try my home phone here. Where three other people live and SLEEP. God dammit, why the fuck would somebody do something that retarded?

IRRITATING.

I swear to God, if he wakes me up at any point and makes me talk to him, I'm going to swear at him and hang up. And that counts in the morning as well.

But yeah. That was pretty much my weekend. I told Dave I'd blog it. And so I did. So I did.

It's almost three in the morning, and I have a dental consultation for my wisdom teeth removal at eleven in the morning, so I'll be off now.

Until next time,
You must master your joystick as a fisherman masters bait.
~Kataron

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Fuck Gophers

Greetings, bitches of the internet.

And bitches of the sea.

Well, I guess the bitches of the sea would need internet access to read this...so they would still fall under the first category.

Which...Makes the last two paragaphs, albeit small, completely superfluous. Oh...And this one...Fuck.

So my weekend was interesting.

On Friday, my parents went away for the weekend.

Yeah, still in Rockwood, no reason to go back to Kitchener without a working computer.

So Friday, they went away. Youth group was fucked up because some bitches rented the hall for a wedding reception or some shit like that, and apparently they rented it the night before they needed it, too, to set up stuff. Except they weren't setting things up until the next day, they were just cooking in the kitchen, which we weren't in. So we had to leave. Andrew and I went to Williams, where I consumed a delicious vanilla milkshake and viewed comical videos on the interwebs with Andrew's laptop. Then we went back to Rockwood, gathered Dave (requiring 175 herbalism), and went back to my place. What with my parents gone and my brother gone to become intoxicated and presumably have homosexual intercourse, we had the place to ourselves. So we played some Call of Duty 4, and Dave teamkilled like MAD.

Example.

Me: Dave, there's a hostage in this next room, he's on your team, don't shoot him.
Dave: Which one is he?
Me: He's the one tied to the chair. Don't shoot the one in the chair.

Dave subsequently burst into the room and fired a shotgun round directly into the man's chest.

Dave: Ohhhhh, don't kill the man in the chair.

And then when they were leaving, I threw up. Why? I dunno. I felt sick, I guess. Friday was a shitty day in general. I wasted a lot of time doing nothing, got sick, and felt lousy for various reasons all day. Not an experience I'd like to relive.

Saturday was marginally better. I woke up, and within half an hour there was a knock on my door. Why, who could it be?! Dave and Eric, at my house bright and early (okay, so around noon), and they stayed most of the day. We began things with more Call of Duty, and then the parade started.

Warning: Parades in Rockwood SUCK.

Except the parade of lights. I like that one 'cause it's simple, you know what you're in for, and there's no way it can disappoint you.

This one though, it had a marching band from acton, a bunch of kids on bikes, and a bunch of other random pointless shit. And then it had the vet clinic float, which is usually the only interesting float. But this time it was just lunacy and madness. It was a western thing, with a saloon and a jail, but everyone was a dog. They all had dog masks on. They were normal people, except for the dog masks.

What the fuck? WHAT THE FUCK? WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE?! WHY?! WHY DID I SEE PEOPLE DRESSED IN DOG MASKS?! I DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND! BECAUSE IT'S THE VET CLINIC? FUCK THAT, THAT'S STUPID. IT PISSED ME THE FUCK OFF.

And then there was a man in a car with a watergun. The fool thought he could get us. THE FOOL. We were inside, laughing and saying loud (and sometimes racist) comments through the open window. But the window only opens at the top, so he couldn't shoot us. But he tried. HE TRIED. We mocked him. It was good times.

After that, we proceeded to watch an ungodly number of episodes of Popular. And I don't care what people say, I love that show. It's good. We went through A LOT OF THAT SHOW. And we ate a lot.

I mean, have Dave and Eric over at your place for a day, and see how much they eat. Geeeeeeez. We were out of hot dogs, Kraft Dinner, chicken nuggets, and ice cream by the time it was said and done. And we had to go out and get the ice cream. And more Coke. And then most of that Coke was gone, too.

So yeah, it was pretty much Popular for the rest of the day, and then we called people and asked them if they were circumcised. Good times.

Then Sunday I cleaned up, sat around, and the past two days have been a blur. Except today, I spent a bunch of time on-line talking to Amy, because my mom didn't need the laptop for work stuff. So today, all in all, was a pretty good day.

But yes. This is a blog post. This is what I have been doing. I hope you fucking vultures are satisfied, and I hope you burn in hell.

I mean...Y'all come back now, y'hear?!

Oh, and I've decided that I'm going to lose weight. Why, you ask?

For health reasons? Psh, fuck that, I've had an unhealthy lifestyle for years, I don't give a shit.

Because you want to feel better about yourself? Meh.

It's for a girl, isn't it? Oh, you smug bastard. My goal is abs, because Amy would like it if I got them. So I've taken up jogging again, and I'm doing some other generic exercises I found in order to reach said goal.

It's going to take a long time.

But yeah.

That's pretty much it.

I'm going to go to bed now, I am exhausted.

Until next time,
I don't know how many people passed my house that Saturday and heard me yelling the word "FUCK!" for no particular reason. Good times.
~Kataron

Friday, June 13, 2008

Awkward.

I would just like to take this moment to note that my brother and three of his male friends are in our living room right now watching pornography.

Just...Thought you should know.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Attack Dogs

So, I have really mixed feelings about attack dogs.

I mean, on one hand, they're vicious killers.

But on the other hand...

PUPPIES!

I always feel bad for killing them in games. I mean, they come up to me all menacing and stuff, and I have to shoot them. Or cut them up. Or snap their necks. And I always, ALWAYS feel bad.

Unless it's Resident Evil and they're zombie dogs. In that case? Fuck them.

But yeah.

Just...Thought you guys should know.

oh, and as of this afternoon, my front two teeth are looking great again. Thanks Asian Dentist Man!

Until next time,
*goes back to watching the first Rambo movie*
~Kataron

Sunday, June 08, 2008

Support Our Blogs

You know who I hate?

People that have those "Support Our Troops" bumper stickers. I see those, and it just makes me angry.

I mean, I have nothing against our troops or any such thing, I just think that those bumper stickers are exceedingly pointless. I mean, HOW do they want us to support our troops?

Moral support? 'cause really, I don't think that'll do much, and it'll take more than a bumper sticker to stir that up.

Do they want me to see that, and get inspired, and go out and enlist?

'cause that's not gonna happen. And if that's what they want me to do, then they should do it themselves, and not be driving around in their cars trying to convince me to support the troops.

Bumper stickers are stupid unless they contain hilarious messages. They shouldn't have serious messages on them. 'cause really, the road isn't where I want to think about things. If I'm going somewhere, I just want to get there and set something on fire, not ponder what I read on the back of a car.

But if a car wants to give me a quick laugh, then I'm fine with that!

Also, I hate people that wear socks and sandals. It's just gross. Just. Gross.

I wish I had a hydraulic baseball bat.

I have no idea how the fuck that would work. But it sounds AWESOME.

If I was a superhero, I would shoot bolts of lightning out of my crotch.

*thrust* *ZAP!*
*thrust* *ZAP!*
*thrust* *ZAP!*

Heck yeah.

*wanders off*

Until next time,
I wonder what the internet would look like without the space bar...
~Kataron

Saturday, June 07, 2008

BEARDLY

*hasn't blogged here in a while*

Not much going on, I guess. Still in Rockwood because Kitchener doesn't have anything interesting for me. My computer there is pretty much fucked, my cell isn't paid off. I'm sort of afraid to turn my computer there on, the fan goes crazy and it's gotten worse and worse. So I've got very little to do down there. I need to get my cell paid off and find some sort of working computer, preferably one capable of running WoW. I miss Bear.

But yeah.

There's definitely a cake in my freezer. I'm pretty psyched for it. Pretty damn psyched.

But it's like three am, I'm going to finish watching this episode and go to bed, I'm freaking tired.

and imdb seems to be down. *sadness*

Sleep now.

Until next time,
I'm awesome, for one hundred and one reasons.
~Kataron